5 Reasons Shopping is Better Than Sex

Sex is a great thing. But do you know what can be even better? No…. not chocolate (well, okay, that too… sometimes). I’m talking about shopping! And do you know what? That doesn’t just apply to my shopaholic gal pals either. Whether you’re a regular at the mall or an in-and-out type of shopper, it has some perks even sex can’t compete with. Let’s take a look.

Here are five reasons shopping is better than sex:

1. Instant Gratification

Sure, you might still have to go through the pursuit if you’re looking for that killer pair of shoes or that perfect deal. But when you really want something right now, you can just go out and get it. No begging or pleading. No excuses. No waiting around on someone else’s interest to be piqued. With shopping you can often get what you want when you want it. Are you as lucky in your sex life? (For your sake, I’ll hope you are.)

2. Generous Return Policies

Are you just not feeling that new pair of jeans the day after buying them? Not the perfect fit after all? Thank goodness for generous return policies! You can just hop in the car, take it back to the store, get your money back, and no hard feelings. Sex not so hot? Yeah. Good luck “returning” your lover with that kind of ease.

3. Consistent Strenuous Activity

They don’t say “shop ’til you drop” for nothing. A marathon shopping session with laps around the mall or your favorite stores (carrying heavy bags no less) might be far better for your health than a marathon sex session. Need an excuse to go shopping? You’re welcome.

4. Less Guilt

When you go shopping you don’t have to worry about things like hurting people’s feelings and all of the drama that can come along with sex (at least not usually) if it doesn’t work out or if you’re having a bad day. Sure, you might occasionally suffer from buyer’s remorse. But if you do, see #2 again.

5. Eye Candy

When you go shopping you can check out all the competition you like. Nobody’s going to call you out or get pissed off if they catch you drooling over that pair of pumps or the latest tech gadget you just can’t live without.

As you can see, shopping definitely has its perks. I don’t know about you, but I can tell you I won’t be giving up one for the other. Still, it’s nice to know your options.

So what about you? Can you think of any other things shopping has over sex? Or are you the type who can’t get into shopping (and why)? Which is better in your book?